It's so hard to explain, but this year's Thanksgiving was met with a high level of anxiety on my part. Don't get me wrong, I loved spending time with my teeny family, and the food was amazing. But, this holiday has been one that, ever since I became health-conscious, has concerned me.
Any day that is completely dedicated to gorging ourselves on fat-laden, high calorie food is going to set off my disordered thinking. This one was no different. Since I am so aware of the 5 pounds of "party weight" that I put on over this quarter, I was afraid of setting myself farther back. I did make myself a well-balanced, vegan meal, but I put a lot of pressure on myself not to eat too much of everything. I had to keep reminding myself that I was filling my body with fuel- and some very nutritious fuel at that.
I am actually pretty proud of how I ended up eating. It was more than I planned, but again, my expectations may have been unreasonable. And I find myself no very full, but I enjoyed every bite, and I know that each one was full of fresh, colorful, and nutritious fare.
The second not-so-happy part of the day was the overwhelming loneliness that I couldn't keep out of my mind. I didn't realize how hard all these upcoming family days are going to be. I feel like I am missing part of my family. It has been nearly 2 months since the break up, but I am still a mess. I feel like this isn't how it was supposed to go, and I am drowning, grasping for some sense of normalcy.
So add anxiety about the food + lingering heartbreak + this chest-cold that I haven't been able to get rid of = an emotional holiday for Rachel.
The highlight of the day was definitely the eats, and the time spent with my amazing family and new niece-doggy, Jolene.
Let's take a look shall we? Thank you to Jenn for hosting another WIA event. Two in one week? Did I go to heaven?
|Breakfast: baked apple oat bran with orange tea.|
|OOTD. Thanksgiving is an informal affair at our house. Real pants are totally not necessary.|
|The spread, and my broski ready to dig in.|
|My plate (x2 + some picking): salad, green beans, homemade cranberry sauce, lentil-stuffed portabello, roasted sweet pot with acorn squash and some unpictured mulitgrain bread.|
|Desert spread: mom's pumpkin pie w/ cool whip, my vegan apple crisp.|
|My plate (x 3) I seriously ate like half that pan. Vegan apple crisp with black decaf.|
|Meet Jolene. My bro and his girlfriend just adopted her. 6 mo old puggle. Absolutely adorable and the sweetest dog ever.|
|One more because she is too precious|
|Me and the broski|
|The men assume their positions.|
Happy Thanksgiving! This year, I am thankful for resiliency and knowing that there is always tomorrow. A new day, for a new start.